Day 83

Monday November 8, 2010

I am so happy Eileen is back!! Life seems easier with her here!! The kids are ecstatic that Auntie Eileen is here. She just brings a breath of fresh air to us! She knows just how to help, reassures me when I need it, redirect me when I'm off base, and validates my concerns so I don't feel like I'm going bonkers. Eileen is my "kindred spirit" just as Anne from Anne of Green Gables (one of my favorite books as a teen) said about her best friend Diana.

This morning, I dropped off Teddy at school and was delighted that he gave me a hug in front of his buddies. This in of itself is a big deal because since last year he hasn't really wanted to demonstrate affection in front of his friends at school. However, it was also a huge deal because he woke up tantrumming and with the biggest, nastiest scowl on his face! It is such a pleasure to wake up to that! Good thing I'm a cup half-full kind of mama :)

After dropping off Teddy, I rushed back home and picked up the girls. Today was Nina's first Avastin treatment. We checked into the hospital and found our way to 4N. I had a headache! I just felt very heavy about doing the IV chemo. I felt heavy about doing the chemo in pill form to, but I had read about all of the possible side effects of Avastin and the increase for hemorrhaging had me freaked out!! All I could think about was Nina bleeding internally. Agghhhh!!!

Nina was mad that she had to have her port accessed and the nurse got a little testy when I mentioned that it didn't draw consistently once she was beginning to consider having to re-access becuase blood wasn't coming out. I love how people just think they can be "sassy" when your kid is dying of cancer! Hello!!!!!

Nina was uber happy when breakfast (pancakes and the fixings) arrived shortly after the IV fluids were started. I ran downstairs and grabbed Eileen and I chiliquiles! Yum!! The three of us ate then we played Mahjong on the ipad and downloaded some new games per Eileen's suggestion. Dr. Slomiany came in to check on us and was floored at how good a Mahjong player Nina was. Nina smiled impishly :) I adore that smile!! All in all, the treatment went great. We were there for almost 4 hours and at the end Nina also got cheese pizza delivered to our room. She was happy and we were so grateful all went well!

After checking out, we returned home and just relaxed for the rest of the day. The visiting nurses from Hospice came and we caught up on all the treatments and plans. They brought up a good point that sometimes the second round of chemo causes more side-effects. That made think about whether or not we should do the second round of Avastin after Thanksgiving. I made a mental note to talk to Dr. Slomiany and Dr. Greenfield about this during our next visits, which was tomorrow. Other than complaining of feeling dizzy and a bit of a headache (which we gave her medicine for) Nina did amazing. No side effects! What a miracle!

I picked up Teddy and we went to Blenders for a treat. He told me about how one of his buddies had gotten in trouble. I was happy to hear his thoughts and so grateful he was willing to share them with me. Homework wasn't too bad.  A bit of whining but nothing like last week. The prospect of tutoring had been fairly punishing so he was trying his best. Todd hadn't looked into finding someone. I decided to see if he found someone before searching myself.

While Eileen and Nina watched Sponge Bob, Teddy and I tackled double digit addition which he did pretty well on! Aside from having Eileen living with us, things seemed normal. How strange and funny all wrapped into one weird sandwich that I could even say that....normal????? What is normal for us any more???? Nothing!