Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Loving Teddy

Our beautiful boy!
We want to ask everyone to also pray for our boy Teddy. Teddy is our heart, our rascal, and our sensitive loving boy. We want folks to know that we are letting Teddy take the lead in asking questions. As he asks, we answer honestly and thoughtfully. Teddy loves his little sister and she in turn adores him. To her, Teddy is the sunshine in her world. No one has ever been able to make Nina laugh more so than Teddy. Everything Teddy did, Nina would want to as well...not out of competition but because she wanted to always be close to him.

For those of you who know our family, also know how anxious Teddy is and how hard we have worked as a family over the course of the last 3 years. My grief about Nina was only compounded exponentially with grief about Teddy. The first thought that crossed my mind after I found out what was wrong with Nina was "What is this going to do to Teddy?"

Teddy's biggest fear in life has been that we were going to die. Initially, I could not fathom how he would survive this. But over the course of the last 5 days, God has shown us that His provision for Teddy will be magnificent and that Teddy will indeed survive and thrive.

The reality is that despite the outcome, this experience will transform our son. If we get our miracle and Nina survives, then Teddy will be shaped by the healing that surrounded us as a family. If Nina is suppose to go to Heaven, then he will be transformed by the mercy God will pour over us. Perhaps he will want to be the one to find a cure for this (he has always wanted to be a scientist) or perhaps he will want to be a Starbucks barista...does not matter as long as he is strengthened by the gift that his little sister is!

With that in mind, we ask that folks please be mindful and respectful of our son. I really want him to have a wonderful first week of school. Since last Friday, I have been coordinating with the principal at Kellogg and she has ensured that Teddy is surrounded by all his friends and that they as a school are prepared to support us in whatever capacity.

So please keep Teddy in your prayers and please follow the guidelines presented below:

1. Do not ask Teddy anything about his sister related to her illness.
2. Do not ask Teddy any questions related to how he is feeling about his sister being sick, treatment, etc. Let him talk to you and redirect him to us, his parents, for the answers to these questions.
3. Do not cry in front of Teddy or Nina. When you are with us and our children we are HAPPY!!!! There will be a time for tears, but we will follow our son's lead. We will NOT impose any of our emotions on him. That is NOT an acceptable burden to place on a child.
4. Do talk to Teddy about Teddy. Have fun!
5. Do tell Teddy that you love him and enjoy playing with.
6. Do laugh and listen to his stories.
7. Do pray for Teddy to have strength.
8. Do pray that Teddy's anxiety can be conquered.
9. Do pray that we, as his parents, have wisdom in how to best support him.
10. Do enjoy Teddy for Teddy, not because his little sister is sick. Do NOT pity our son. LOVE him!

Bottom-line is that we have two children and they are equally precious and important to us. We are happy to have people who care in our lives but I want to make myself perfectly clear....Todd and I will NOT accept any inappropriate behavior toward our son. If you cannot keep it together....stay away. Just send us a text reminding us you care. Anyone who cannot follow these guidelines will be asked to leave and not return. I do not want to sound harsh, but this is not the time for niceties. I am a ferocious mama bear!!! You have all been warned :)

Playing at the beach 2 months ago!
Thank you, thank you...and please keep praying for and loving our Teddy!

Cuddling with sister a year ago.


  1. Rosy, you and Todd are amazing parents to Nina AND Teddy, and Teddy is an incredibly little boy and the best big brother on earth. I know that your love and grace and strength right now are his best guide.

  2. Sending you all love, strength and positive thoughts from just down the street.

    PS: Dom and I would love to take Teddy out for an afternoon of fun!!

  3. Your strength and wisdom are inspiring. The outcome of this incredibly rough lesson in life, whatever it is, will ultimately be a lesson bigger than we could all imagine, and one that you, Rosy, are allowing us to experience with you by sharing your deepest thoughts. I absolutely love your outlook and strength. I admire you even more now. God Knows why he wants you to learn such a lesson that most of us are not equipped to face. Thank you for sharing this lesson with us. My prayers and thoughts are with you each and every day.

  4. Now THAT'S the Rosy we all love and adore! Thank you for your honesty...you are being who God created you to be! You are leading us all well...

    Thoughts of you fill our days and nights...we love you and are standing with you.

    Anything, Anytime....
    Michael and Sonja

  5. Rosy,
    For all you have done for my family over the past 10 years, please know that I am here in whatever capacity you may need me. May god give you and Todd strength and light during this time.
    I will be praying for Nina's miracle always and will share a smile with Teddy at the end of each school day.

    Love, Melissa.

  6. Rosy and Todd,
    Teddy and Nina are truly blessed to have you as parents, and we are all blessed to know you and share in this experience with you. Your strength and wisdom in this terribly difficult time are inspirational. God's grace is ever present in you. Our prayers and love are with you every second.

  7. Rosy,

    I am so sorry to hear your news. I have friends who's child was diagnosed with brain cancer and they travelled the world for help. In the end, the outcome was not good, but they learned a tremendous amount. I would be happy to give you their information if anything they learned would be of help to you.

    Carol Eisenberg